Sunday, July 18, 2010

To My Cheerleader

Recently a very good friend of mine, Nanc, asked if I had read the July 2nd post on Orangette. She recommended that I take a read of the post and tell her what I thought. I popped over to the blog and took a read and instantly felt like I was reading pages out of my own diary. Lately I have had a major drain of my mojo and inspiration. Must be contagious because my sister spoke of the same ailment taking her over a couple of weeks ago on her own blog.

This whole journey of trying to open a restaurant and secure funds and having very little support emotionally from those that we really want it from has taken such a major drain on my spirit. The commercial development game is a lot like playing "Sorry" and getting your ass bumped back to the beginning over and over again. To the point that in a highly hormonal moment last week I just cried and said, "I don't want to do this anymore. Fuck this!" After my raging pregnancy hormones quelled, I was quite embarrassed that I had even uttered such nonsense. Even still my mojo tank was on empty and ideas on how to reinvent this process to obtain our dream had me at a loss.
In this life I truly believe that there are people placed into your life that will always feed you what you need, even if you may not realize it at that time. That food might be love, discipline, hard reality or inspiration. And after an hour long phone conversation with Nanc the other day I realized that she is my spiritual personal chef. When I walk through door beat up and ready to quit, she always offers up a hot plate of inspiration and positive energy for me to dig my fork into. She's got a great compass that points me into the right direction to pull ideas and get me off my ass. Not saying that I'm lazy, but making your dreams come to fruition is the hardest thing that you can do in this life, because sometime poeple don't understand nor support your passions.
That said, after reading the Orangette post I realized that I don't have to be a slave to always posting recipes, that sometime a great idea can get too big and that downsizing that great idea is not the loss of the original inspiration. And though officially 11 weeks knocked up, I can handle everything that is put in front of me.
So where do we go from here? Well in the next week I will be posting a link to our "Kickstarter" page. Kickstater is a website that allows entrepreneurs to post their ideas for funding. These projects range from art, films, book publishing and even help with starting a bistro. You can pledge a $1 or $1000. So since the banks won't help and the investors want my kidney and our new baby as part of the deal, we are going grassroots and doing it ourselves.
In closing, I wanted to thank every client that has helped our catering business grow, every friend and family member that said we unquestionably believe in you and know that you will reach your goal and a special thank you to Nanc Brennen, you are my soul sister and an invaluable friend in my life. I just hope that I give you back everything that you give to me.

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