To My Cheerleader

Recently a very good friend of mine, Nanc, asked if I had read the July 2nd post on Orangette. She recommended that I take a read of the post and tell her what I thought. I popped over to the blog and took a read and instantly felt like I was reading pages out of my own diary. Lately I have had a major drain of my mojo and inspiration. Must be contagious because my sister spoke of the same ailment taking her over a couple of weeks ago on her own blog.

This whole journey of trying to open a restaurant and secure funds and having very little support emotionally from those that we really want it from has taken such a major drain on my spirit. The commercial development game is a lot like playing "Sorry" and getting your ass bumped back to the beginning over and over again. To the point that in a highly hormonal moment last week I just cried and said, "I don't want to do this anymore. Fuck this!" After my raging pregnancy hormones quelled, I was quite embarrassed that I had even uttered such nonsense. Even still my mojo tank was on empty and ideas on how to reinvent this process to obtain our dream had me at a loss.
In this life I truly believe that there are people placed into your life that will always feed you what you need, even if you may not realize it at that time. That food might be love, discipline, hard reality or inspiration. And after an hour long phone conversation with Nanc the other day I realized that she is my spiritual personal chef. When I walk through door beat up and ready to quit, she always offers up a hot plate of inspiration and positive energy for me to dig my fork into. She's got a great compass that points me into the right direction to pull ideas and get me off my ass. Not saying that I'm lazy, but making your dreams come to fruition is the hardest thing that you can do in this life, because sometime poeple don't understand nor support your passions.

That said, after reading the Orangette post I realized that I don't have to be a slave to always posting recipes, that sometime a great idea can get too big and that downsizing that great idea is not the loss of the original inspiration. And though officially 11 weeks knocked up, I can handle everything that is put in front of me.

So where do we go from here? Well in the next week I will be posting a link to our "Kickstarter" page. Kickstater is a website that allows entrepreneurs to post their ideas for funding. These projects range from art, films, book publishing and even help with starting a bistro. You can pledge a $1 or $1000. So since the banks won't help and the investors want my kidney and our new baby as part of the deal, we are going grassroots and doing it ourselves.

In closing, I wanted to thank every client that has helped our catering business grow, every friend and family member that said we unquestionably believe in you and know that you will reach your goal and a special thank you to Nanc Brennen, you are my soul sister and an invaluable friend in my life. I just hope that I give you back everything that you give to me.

Dinner for One

Today is Memorial Day and it has been pretty sucky so far. My husband went boating all day and then off to a BBQ, while I stayed home with the boy and cleaned the house with a pending case of bronchitis. Seriously, I feel like Mary Elizabeth Mastrantonio from "The Abyss" when she purposely drowned herself and Ed Harris brought her back to life. Lungs full of liquid, burning chest. If that fine ass Ed Harris was here it might make me feel a little better. Lord a Mercy that man was fine! But to digress, with the boys out of the house at the BBQ, I got to do something that I have not done in a long time. I made dinner for myself.

It was fabulous. I made whole wheat rotini with lemon cream sauce, roasted chicken, pancetta and asparagus. Had a big ol' glass of wine (which I'm sure doesn't help the bronchitis) and was able to eat my entire dinner SLOWLY. No getting up five hundred times to get a refill of orange juice, a napkin, a nothin'. It was vanglorious! So I am going to let you enjoy my dinner as well, try it at home and I ask that you sit down by yourself and enjoy dinner for one.

Rotini with Roasted Chicken, Pancetta and Lemon Cream Sauce

• 1 cup heavy whipping cream
• 1 cup grated Parmesan
• 1 tbsp chopped shallots
• 1 tbsp chopped garlic
• 1 tsp lemon zest
• 1 tbsp unsalted butter
• salt and pepper to taste
• 1 chicken breast
• 5 slices pancetta
• 1 tbsp thyme
• 1/4 cup sliced yellow onion
• 1 cup chicken stock
• olive oil
• 2 cups whole wheat rotini

Preheat oven on broil setting. Lay slices of pancetta on a prepared sheet pan. Place pancetta in the oven and cook until crispy. Once crispy, lay pancetta slices on a paper towel and allow them to cool. Once cooled, crumble slices into small pieces and set aside.

Take chicken breast and salt and pepper both sides of the chicken breast. On either a hot pan or cast iron griddle add a little olive oil and sear both sides of the chicken breast. If in a pan add yellow onion, thyme and chicken stock. If on a griddle transfer chicken to a pan and add the previous ingredients. Place a lid on the pan and reduce heat. Roast until chicken is cooked through and then let chicken rest for 5 min before pulling chicken apart. Set shredded chicken aside for later.

Begin boiling water for rotini. Once water comes to a boil add rotini. In a medium sized sauce pan, add olive oil and bring to medium heat. Add shallots and cook until shallots become soft. Add garlic, salt and pepper. Once garlic becomes fragrant add heavy cream and reduce heat to medium/low heat. Slowly incorporate Parmesan and stir until Parmesan is melted into cream. Add butter and zest to sauce. Take a ladle full of pasta water from rotini and add to sauce. This will thicken the sauce.

Drain pasta once al dente and add to sauce along with chicken and asparagus. Cook until the ingredients are coated with sauce. Place in a serving bowl and top with pancetta and more shredded Parmesan.

The Universe Trust Fall

So I again I will start this blog with the usual apologies for staying away so long. Sorry! It has been a very demanding month. To say that recent events don't have me scared out of my mind would be a bold lie. My friends tell me that when you take risk you should be scared. But being scared is very uncomfortable for me and talking about it, puts me in a place of vulnerability that I have never been comfortable being in.
In 10 days we close escrow on a building that will be the home of our first restaurant. It's an amazing two story building that will house "Eight American Bistro" on the bottom floor and live/work lofts on the second. The later phase will be a penthouse on the third floor. The whole project will be a "green" project. Over 40% of the build will be with recycled products and the other 60% sustainable products. Everybody that is working on the project is soooo excited. It stands to be a catalyst for "green" urban infill in Sacramento. There is just one little problem. Though we have heavy investor interest to back the project once we own the building we still have not been able to rally all the funding towards the down payment to buy the building.
We had investors that were interested before we went into escrow to fund the entire project and entered into escrow based on initial meetings, but disagreements on the details of the deal led to a parting of ways.
So now here we are with the building of our dreams, and more than 165K short of making those dreams come to fruition. I'm trying to find a more poetic way of saying, "This fuckin' sucks!" But lack of sleep is depriving me of such eloquence at this time. The thing that scares me the most really is not that we may lose this building, it's everyone that is so excited about working on this project. From project contractors and consultants to future chefs and serving staff. This whole thing is bigger than Ian and I having the restaurant that we always wanted, it's the community that we have the opportunity to build. The new jobs that will be created, the shift in the way we construct buildings, how we responsibly tackle urban infill and how we take control of the food we eat and make, to ensure we live healthier longer lives....I'm scared to lose all that. It's bigger than just a fabulous location, though it is an amazing location, it's a year and a half of wanting something better for my community and fearing that it could all be gone because of 165 thousand stupid dollars. It keeps me up at night, it makes me cry in the shower so that no one can see, it has me praying to a God that I haven't had a relationship with in three years. It has me scared.
An advisor told me two months ago that I need to move forward with everything that I am doing to make this dream come true. That there will be times of uncertainty, but I had to trust in the Universe. That sometimes people hesitate to make moves because they feel they might not have all their ducks in a row. He said, "Make moves like you do have all your ducks in a row and the Universe will catch you."
And so far it has.
But I get more scared as we near this deadline and attempts to acquire the rest of the down payment just keep not working out. Maybe this is the part of the journey were I need to turn around, cross my arms over my chest, close my eyes and just fall.

The Search for Authenticity

It's terrible that I have neglected the blog for so long. I treat it like a houseplant, hence the reason I don't have any live house plants...BUT I'm back and have so much to write about. This month has been the epitome of CRAZY. I went and saw this psychic in Folsom that said, "the next two months, you are going to be so busy it's going to feel like your life is falling apart." He was NOT joking! I'm so stressed out that for three days in a row I forgot to eat breakfast and lunch. That's busy!
So here is the scoop, we found a building that we want to open our restaurant in and are currently in a counter offer bidding war. We have potential investors, but they are from overseas and we don't know if they are legit, we are getting our backyard transformed into a organic vegetable garden for free and on national television, and this week alone I've been working on five caterings, been on the morning news and started working with my new partner for the launch of our online store at the end of this month! CRAZY!!!
And did I mention that 50% of my friends and family are born in the month of March, so it was like birthday party central up in this biotch for four weeks straight. Plus I had two weddings to attend, one in Sacramento and the other in New Orleans. And with that, it will be a wonderful segue into today's blog.
New Orleans, it's my birthplace, the home of amazing people and I was told even more amazing food. Well they lied! I went to New Orleans with my head in the clouds, expecting remarkable food on every corner. I thought that it would be dreamy and intoxicating, with heavy moss covered Live Oaks lining the streets and the smell of gumbo in the air. Southern hospitality at it's finest. I thought that someone would pass me by on the street and take one look into my hazel eyes and say, "Aww gurl, you is Creole fo' sho" and give me a spontaneous voodoo reading about my past lives in the South and my French ancestry. Jesus, what a wake up call I got.
The last time I was in New Orleans I was two years old. So it was my bad for imagining such a fantasy. The first couple of days were disappointing to say the least. It was no different from the super touristy jook joints that you would find in any city. My search for authentic southern food went unanswered for the entire time that we were there; we took local recommendations, magazines reviews, hotel concierge suggestions. All the restaurants, just one disappointing meal after another. I was heartbroken and hungry.
The best meal that we ended up having, was at a small diner called Clover's in the gay district of the French Quarter. We had just left a bar and we were starving. Through the rain, we ran four blocks down a filthy puddle filled street. Left our Bud Lights at the front door and stepped into gay nirvana. Drenched, we sat at the counter and after 10 minutes, were greeted by a soft bodied, overly pale, mid 40's order taker. After scribbling down our order, he posted the tag behind him on the cooks spindle. Our cook was long, lean and had the straightest hot comb pressed hair I have ever seen on a Black man. He had at least 20 different orders going the entire time. He moved from the fryer to the grill to the cold station with the grace of an ice skater. Lip syncing to "Single Ladies" while perfectly assembling my greasy spoon cheeseburger and talking shit to the slow, soft bodied order taker. "Girl, you better move a little faster! I ain't got time fo' yo' shit tonight!"
I, for the 30 minutes that we were there, was in heaven. Then Beyonce's coworker came around the corner. Eyeliner, size 0 Dereon jeans, and mad jewelry on his wrist. He danced around the diner which was no bigger than my living room, bussing tables and also talking shit to the soft bodied order taker. "If you was sick then WHY did you come to work?!" I told him that it wasn't fair that he, a man, could fit into size 0 Dereon jeans and I, a woman, could not. He snapped his hips back and forth and retorted, "It ain't my fault baby, lose some weight and I'll give you these jeans!" My reply, "Ewwww bitch!" It was all in fun and I tell ya it made the burgers and milkshakes taste even better.
On the plane ride home, my husband and I discussed how disheartening it was that we didn't get that Southern meal that we wanted of New Orleans. In our conversation, we realized that we had had an absolutely wonderful meal. It was at my Aunt Fran's house near Biloxi. We had stopped into Biloxi for two days to visit family and she had hosted a party while we were there. She made her traditional Southern favorites and it was authentic, memorable and satisfying. We had been so stuck on finding real food in a restaurant, that we neglected to realized that "real" Southern food is not available in restaurants, but in the recipes that family pass down from generation to generation. Thank you Aunt Fran, you gave me what I was looking for and now I know that real Southern fare is no further than my own family's cookbook.

And The Winner Is ...

The winner of the Spring Basket from "Mouth Full of Food" is Connie Thompson! Congratulations Connie. Three runners up will recieve mini baskets for their efforts, so congratulations to Abi Robinson, Rachel Wallace and Stacey Ball. Thank you to all that entered, we will have more contests in the future with oppotunities to win excellent culinary prizes.

As I Said, "Above Average, Potential Classic"

Check out this blog write up on a very deserving young, female talent here in Sacramento. I have worked with her before,( post Oct.23 "It WAS Finger Lickin' Good") and she is an amazing chef. http://www.girlsonthegrid.com/?p=2670#more-2670.

You Wanna Gnocchi, You Got It

By request I am posting the gnocchi recipe. As I said it's four ingredients. Super simple but, make sure you have a large work surface to prepare the gnocchi on.

Gnocchi

• 2 large potatoes
• 2 cups all purpose flour
• 1 egg
• pinch of kosher salt

Peel potatoes and chop into large cubes. Place potatoes in a large pot of cold water and bring the water up to a boil. Your potatoes will cook more evenly when placed in cold water and brought up to temperature. Boil until potatoes are cooked through, but still firm. Do not overcook. Drain potatoes and place in a bowl and mash them into a smooth consistency. Let the potatoes cool to room temperature. This allows the majority of the moisture to exit your potatoes . You do not want any excess water in your gnocchi dough. It will also allow you to work the dough with bare hands without burning your tender fingers. Once cooled, in a separate bowl, take one cup of the mashed potatoes and add your flour, egg and salt. Using your hands incorporate all the ingredients together.
On a floured surface, take the gnocchi dough ball and cut into quarters. Working with a quarter at a time, roll the dough into a ball and lay it on the floured work surface. Lightly roll the ball into a long cylindrical shape, like the shape of a snake. Make sure that you have a very even cord. Once you have a cord of dough with even thickness throughout, cut the dough into about 1 inch portions. Set aside on a floured surface. Continue to roll the remaining dough into cords, cutting the dough into the 1 inch dumplings.
After you have finished, take each dumpling and roll them over the back of a fork. This will create little wells that help to hold onto the sauce that you may dress them with after cooking. If you have a gnocchi roller, then go ahead and use it, if not the back of a fork will do. You can also skip this step all together. Often when I am lazy I don't do this last step. They taste the same, rolled or not.
Bring a pot of water to a gentle boil, I like to add a little olive oil to my water. I lightly flour my gnocchi one last time before I add them to the water. Place the gnocchi in the water and cook for about 2-3 minutes. Or until the gnocchi float to the top. Don't crowd your pot with lots of gnocchi, as they will stick together and not cook evenly. Instead work in small batches. Take your cooked gnocchi and dress with whatever your favorite sauce may be. The options are endless, from browned butter to spicy tomato basil. Eat and Enjoy.